No One Told Me Life After Graduating Will Be So... Lonely

 

I think it would've been way more accurate to say that the journey of finding a new job is very lonely.

Lately, I'm just really thinking how it frustrates me that everyone I know, both in real life and virtually, suddenly came up to announce something happy.  You see, they wanted to share some good stuff happening to them.  And that's fine, you know?

Some of them achieved things they've been working on for.  Some of them hit life's milestones and actually got engaged, married, or even had their first kid.  Some of them got a new job and it is something better than their previous ones.

It feels like everyone always has something up their sleeves.

And I'm here, just barely existing and trying to live my life day by day.

I don't even know what I'm doing with my life right now.  I'm not currently preparing for something big or grand.

And I... hated myself for living the way I am right now.

I do have dreams... and I'm mad at myself for not working toward it.  What is it that holds me back?  Am I too perfectionist to even start something if I don't have the correct timing to even start working on it in the first place?  Why can't I just do whatever it is?  Wasn't the journey of a thousand miles begin with a single step, even if it's an imperfect step?